Should We Enter the Lifestyle?
If you are thinking of entering a swinger lifestyle, good communication is critical. There are many different kinds of
swinging. Remember, whichever one you choose is good, as long as your partner and you are clear about what you are
doing and why. Sex is a powerful part of the human experience and the pleasures that may be found in swinging can
generally be reached only when both partners are sensitive to each others needs. Each must put their partner's
confidence and comfort first. From a more realistic point of view, there will always be another party, another personal
ad, or another dance. There may not be another chance to save an exploration into swinging if one partner becomes
overwhelmed and forgets to treat his or her primary partner with sensitivity and respect.
It is important to remember swinging is primarily a social activity. The normal social customs of meeting people and
initiating a conversation are no different than any other type of social interaction. The process by which people in the
lifestyle become close friends is not that different either. The key social behaviors that tend to be appreciated in
the swinging community are responsibility, friendliness, flirtatiousness, open-mindedness, and most importantly stability
with regard to one's primary relationship.
In the context of swinging, couples need not be married. They should, at the very least, have some history together, and
be familiar with each other's emotional needs. This is a imperative when it comes to being comfortable approaching other
couples that are in a swinger lifestyle. The general rule of thumb is that swinging works best when couples view swinging
as an enhancement to their existing relationship, and not as a replacement for it.
It might be worth thinking about whether there are any potential situations that you feel you would be more or less
comfortable in, and then discuss these with your partner. The pros and cons of whether or not you and your mate are
compatible with the lifestyle, or even interested in it, are many. Whatever you do, be sure that both of you are committed
to it, and have had intense dialogue about it, before ever trying it out.